R2R 6: Overcome Failed Resolutions

Here are the secrets of manifestation …

What part of us says ..  “Starting tomorrow, I’m going to wake up early, and exercise” ..
and then,
what part of us stays in bed the next morning .. ??

I know .. we probably mean it well the night before when we commit ourselves to waking up early and exercising..

But, something happens and alters everything in about 8 hours later..

So I decided to investigate this and understand what’s happening within our psyches..

And .. here are the results..

It looks like we have different personalities.. !!

yes, we have different personalities that are active at different times, .. and they act differently according to our moods..

You may think that executing on our resolutions is a matter of changing our mind, or our moods or our thoughts .. I’ve tried that in the past .. without much success .. and you may certainly try that route also, and see if your victories last .. in my experience, my success slowed down over time and left me with more frustration and resentment ..

Without manipulating our thoughts, we need to find another way to overcome our failed resolutions ..

How can we break through what’s holding us back?

The key to success is to integrate our different personalities.

Before we could do that, we need to understand why we have these personalities..

For example, the part of us that says I’m going to exercise might be a people pleaser .. in other words, the idea of exercising is not ours, but it’s somebody else’s .. it may well be our partner’s, our friends’, or maybe our parents .. but, we’re basically responding to others’ expectations of us .. we just want to be accepted by them.. approved by them … and basically that’s why we commit to exercising in the first place..

You may say, what’s wrong with that? I want to exercise too .. I agree with them, and I should be exercising..

Yes, I understand .. you can be very convincing to yourself, and try to do it. But at the end of the day, if it doesn’t last, the question remains .. why don’t we follow through our resolutions?

At this point, we need to dig a little bit deeper into the workings of the psyche.

Here’s what’s going on ..

Your commitment is made by your mind. Your heart and your body are left out from this decision making process.

You can’t really get up early and exercise, because you may not be a morning person after all. And that’s your other personality.

When you have (and we all do) different personalities clashing – in other words, the “people pleaser” going against your “I’m not a morning person”, then your mind, your heart and your body are not aligned.

The probability of success to implement and manifest a resolution in that misaligned state is very unlikely.

Then, the next obvious question is, how to align these major centers. How does your mind, heart and body come together to bring a positive change and deliver to you exactly what you want in your life?  ..

Here are the next steps … and these are the secrets of manifestation..

When you decide to do something, anything, it is a mental activity. Everything is formed in your head. Sometimes, like in our example, you don’t even know if this is something you really want, or your decision is influenced by others’ expectations.

Therefore, it’s always a good thing to bring your idea of “doing something” down to your heart. Just to see what kind of emotions you experience around that decision..

Visualize the situation through your heart, and see what you feel. And don’t be afraid of feeling everything in your body. Welcome all that is arising. Without judgment, simply notice what’s happening in your body.

So in our example, when you visualize yourself getting up early, you might not like the feeling. You might already feel some sort of resentment, like “why do I have to get up so early.. it’s still dark outside” .. with those words, the warmth of your bed will pull you back.. and you won’t be able to resist, and forget about exercising very quickly ..

To expand our example, I’ll share another common experience .. at one point in your life, I’m sure, you wanted to join a gym.. again, when you visualize it, you may find out that you don’t like the plastic, rubber scent in the gym, nor the white neon light that shines upon you when you’re running on the treadmill, or the mirrors are everywhere or the people are all around you ..

What are the chances of going to the gym on a regular basis when you’re feeling like this?

So you can apply this to any decision in your life..

Try to connect with it, not just in your mind, as a thought, but as an emotion in your heart, and as a sensation in your body, then you’ll know whether what you’re trying to bring into your life is going to be a permanent one..

Here’s another tip..

If you connect with something at that level, meaning everything, your mind, heart and body are all aligned, then, you can’t wait to do that activity..

Your body will be craving, your emotions will be all excited, and your mind will be going nuts until you do it.. because you’re so aligned with that activity ..

Now, take a step back, and see what your failed resolutions are .. then try to visualize them to feel what you really want to bring into your life?

And here’s our final step ..

Let’s say ..  you genuinely want to move your body .. your mind is already engaged with this idea..

Now.. Do you really want to move your body? .. check in with your heart..

Then, ask your own body what kind of movement it wants to engage in..

Maybe your body wants to dance, or hike, or stretch or doesn’t want to move at all ..

Now, you’re back to square 1.. you are at a neutral position now .. what would you like to do? .. maybe in the morning, all you want to do is to have a cup of coffee.. or a nice breakfast .. or reading your friends facebook posts .. or sleep in for another 15 mins..

If that’s what you want, accept it and do it .. and while you’re doing it though, observe yourself, and see how much fun you’re having.. if you’re joyful, that means everything is aligned.. if you’re not having fun, that means, one of them is out of alignment.. and you’re conditioned by some outside influence..

As you can see, this is more of an internal work, then, doing something to respond to the pressure of others.. however, over time, you’ll get to know yourself, and make your own decisions, set your own boundaries, and execute on all failed resolutions that were yours .. meaning that they were truly your own resolutions ..

 

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